(written July 3012)
We’ve all got Facebook and twitter crushes.
My fb male crush, I’m pretty sure, is gay. (Which only makes me like him more!)
My female Twitter crush is, I’m pretty sure, straight. (And I wouldn’t want to change that!)
Another male fb crush (straight) turns out to have something in common with me. Something that I’m keeping a secret. Something that I loved but can’t find someone in “real life” who enjoys it as much as I do.
So we’ve begun sending private emails. And some photos which are G-rated. (Get your mind out of the gutter!)
My “bf” is my “best friend” plus excellent benefits, tho he wants to be more. (He’s called me his “wife” lol)
Let’s call him “Anomaly” since that’s what he is.
He’s also away for as much as six months, helping family, tho he’s driving up some weekends…
I love my Anomaly. He loves me.
But my email crush has awoken feelings of fun, teasing, etc, that my Anomaly isn’t into.
Is this cheating?
Email crush and I have no plans to get together. We’re just enjoying a mutual fantasy. But I wouldn’t want Anomaly doing what I am…
Still, since Email Crush and I are just indulging in fantasy …
I know. I know I’m justifying. I’m feeling the most useless emotion: guilt.
To what ends?
Now I’ve got a new “problem” as in a boy I’ve kissed is around & able to tattoo me.
If Anomaly were here it’d be a different story.
But he’s not.
Do I see tattoo boy? Do I continue the fantasy with Email?
Someone tweeted that if I cheat I’ve no right to condemn those who do.
But where is that line?
Anomaly first said he didn’t expect nor want me to wait. But then he says how much he loves / misses / needs me to be here for him…
The word “friend” is thrown about far too often these days. “Facebook friends”. Please. Most of the people we “friend” are lying about something — and sometimes everything.
On Twitter, we have “followers”. As anyone who has had a real life stalker knows, having someone “follow” you can be rather creepy, if not downright scary.
But rather than it being a bad thing, people on Twitter actively seek out new followers. (#FF Fridays: Follow back these people.) On Facebook, we receive recommendations for “People You Might Know”, based on how many “friends” we’ve got in common.
If you look at my list of Facebook “friends” (700+), you might think I have a lot of “friends”. In reality, I have probably only met 10% of these people and the number I would consider actual “friends” is much smaller. I consider others “acquaintances”.
Yet there are bonds, however tenuous, between a lot of those “acquaintances”. Many have similar illnesses. Others are single parents.
My concern is for the generation(s) growing up believing that people on these social network sites are true friends. A true friend is someone you can count on to be there for you and one you would be there for. The ability to randomly block people on such sites gives one a feeling of power. When this seeps out into the real world, it can contribute to what I call “temporary friendships”. If there’s a problem, why work it out when you can write that person off?
I’m curious to see how this will affect divorce rates. I’m referring to people flirting over the internet and believing that because they get along so well online, they should dump the real person in their lives for the one online. When kids are involved, well, it makes things even more complicated.
When people sequester themselves in front of their computer, they often fail to interact with people in the real world. Thus making it more likely that if/when they meet that friend or follower in person, the real world relationship will fail.
(I’m thinking about a teenage couple who can text each other for hours, but have nothing to say when face-to-face.)
So I’ll sign off by confessing I’m a 67 yr old man with 3 wives and 21 kids. 😉