Bad Dad, Part 1

i suppose i could start this by reposting the beginning of a blog i started on MySpace a couple of years ago. it turned out to be about my sons dad, BD, though it didn’t start out that way. all you would need to do is change that girlfriends name from “Creepy” to the current one, “Stuff”, and really you’d have all the info you need to know.

so, where are we in this redundant tale of my ex. (oh! i can’t tell you how hapy it makes me to be able to write that he is my ex. i feel free! literally, like i could fly. for the first time in EIGHT YEARS i don’t have to look over my shoulder when i walk down the street. i don’t have to delete phone calls and texts off of my cell. i can read my emails & my friends –what’s left of them — will know that the replies really did come from me aand not my EX posing as me! Let’s all have a drink to that! lol)

ah, yes. my son has a receital of sorts this wednesday. i convinced him to invite his dad since his dad isn’t working and really just sits about doing crystal meth and crack with the girl who got him fired. (BD had been saving for his own place. a great idea, i thought; maybe it would help him grow up. i wouldn’t let BD live with us, his family didn’t want him there, so, knowing this, stuff gets him fired. where can he go? oh, coincidentally stuff quit her internship at the same time & he can move in with her. he loses 30lbs in the first month, gets the dark circles, and, if possible for one who is schizotipic, gets even more paranoid.) well, despite having nothing better to do than get high, BD said, “I’ll see…if i’m not busy…” (he doesn’t follow conversations very well lately *raised eyebrows*) finally, on thursday, after numerous texts, calls, and asking in person, i told him we were going to invite someone else. no answer.

friday, BD picks up my son (i’d say “our” but he has contributed nothing positive to my sons life. only negative.). i forgot to ask what time BD would bring my son home on sunday, so i called no answer. i text, “what time will he be home sunday?” on and on for almost two hours, by which point i was about to call the police and had already sent texts to BDs younger sister and mother. he calls & says, “i don’t have to answer when you call every 30 seconds.” i reply, “I wouldn’t have to call every 5 minutes if you would answer the first time.” of course he would’ve felt stupid if he wasn’t so burnt.

this morning i send him a text asking if he could pick up some socks from the dollar store. apparently he couldn’t since he had to buy himself a large dunkin donuts coffee…

oh, this is boring even me.

so with this new freedom i have, i was seeing a girl who went a little off the rails on me. then there was that flirtation with the 20yr old boy (hey, stuff is 20! at least my 20yr old works, goes to school, doesn’t look 15yrs older than he is from doing copious amounts of crack and meth.). i am tempted to pull over ShyBoy and say, “you do know i am not looking for a boyfriend, right?” because how could he not be into me, unless he isn’t into fluffy chicks but then i could explain how my EX kept me fat and now that i was going to lose the weight it would be more fun with a partner… oh, give it up.

ShyBoy does have a good-looking co-worker who gave me his #. although i was really hoping for a woman. after all, BD is the ONLY guy i’ve ever given up women for. (*bangs head against wall* stupid stupid stupid)

i’m thinking this might be more interesting if i wrote about, um, sex? my booty call is an ex, a somewhat friend, a cool guy, even if he did cause my nervous breakdown by forcing me into an abortion i knew i’d never emotionally survive. but after 6 or 7 booty calls, i haven’t gotten off ONCE! and i have freaking directions! (a hood piercing. also left and right outer labia, both nipples, navel… but “go for the hood!” it’s in the freaking middle! lick your middle finger&make swirleys lol it’s not hard.) still, he is like BD, minus the temper.

see, BD and i are into the same reading material, we like watching the same things, we have the same stupid / sick sense of humour, and the sex is amazing! but that temper. which leads to BD treating my — our — son like crap, and then treating me like crap. i just can’t deal plus, my son is #1.

its hot in here. maybe i’ll take another shower and curse the fact that i get $ to buy an air conditioner AFTER memorial day sales. BD promised we’d get his mom’s unused but still working a.c. but then when i told him no sex, he said no a,c, even tho our son needs it medically & will dehydrate without it. nice guy, huh?

i need a cigarette. Marlboro Ultra Light 100’s here i come… (now how does Slash do his emoticon with the top hat and cigarette? i just take off the top hat…)


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